Apple has a cute little saying for their iPhone and iPad: “There’s an apps for that.” This applies to most things, since there are millions of apps in the App Store, and the number grows every day. Still, there are a few functions that could definitely use apps, and I am fairly sure no one has invented them yet.
If you are an app developer willing to create an apps that millions of people will love, keep reading. If you know of an app that already does one of these functions, call me an idiot and correct me. Go through following apps.
1. Tracking a USPS/UPS/FedEx carrier
Yes, you can track a package from sender to destination. There is an app for that. What I want an app to do is actually track the person delivering packages. UPS will tell you they have no way of contacting drivers on their trucks. I know that is a lie because I got them to do it once. This app will take it a step further and give you GPS locations for current UPS, FedEX, or US Postal Service trucks.
Has your driver stopped to get coffee eight times today? Your app will tell you. Did the drive claim he knocked on your door but really never even came up to your porch? There’s an app for that.
2. Child noise cancellation
Children are the most adorable and lovely creatures on earth, but sometimes they can be down right annoying. Many smartphones have pretty sophisticated microphones that can pick up sensitive noises. It would be awesome to have an app that could detect a child’s frequency range, sync to it, and cancel out the noise with something soothing.
3. Meeting summarizer
You missed this morning’s meeting on purpose. You hate meetings, and it seems like almost everyone does. But there are always a few people in the office who insist upon them and even beg the boss to schedule extra meetings. These same people talk the most at the meetings and make them drag on for hours.
Imagine if you had an app that would record the meeting, sift through the rubbish to find important things like deadlines, and then summarize it for you?
4. Wife reminder
This is not an app to remind your wife. It is an app to remind husbands about their wives. You ladies out there know what I mean. The husband who forgets your anniversary and other important dates needs a little kick to remind him. This app is not just a calendar alarm.
It actually records the wife’s voice crying, yelling, or just giving a sweet reminder (whatever works to get the man’s attention). You can set it to remind him at intervals throughout the year, month, or even day (effective for simple tasks like mowing the lawn).
5. Snappy comeback app
He thinks he is so clever. He picked up your self-esteem and knocked it right out of the park with one sentence. Five hours later, while eating dinner at home, you finally think of a comeback, but it is too late. This rather sophisticated app allows for quick searching of thousands of insults, offering you a variety of snappy comebacks.
6. The meta-unfriender
He was the love of your life. He was your everything. He hopefully was not the same guy who made you wish you had the snappy comeback app. Oh wait, he was? Well, now you want to break up with him, but it is so much trouble. You have to unfriend and unfollow him from Facebook, Twitter, and Tumblr. You have to delete all of the pictures you took of him, remove his YouTube videos, and update your Facebook status to “single”.
On your phone, you have a heart next to his name and a special ring tone. Your computer even has him on the wallpaper. Well, guess what. There’s an app for that. The meta-unfriender will systematically remove him from every aspect of your life with the press of a button.
These are apps for real people with real problems. Forget about apps that help you share pictures of your cat. These apps are the ones that will help people live better lives free of noise, meetings, and insulting friends.